Watch Out for the Sausages!

Thank you to Anne Rulo for finding both video (found at 1:25) and a picture of the ill-fated sausage race...  So hilarious.  

Enjoy!

Too Funny to Not Post About

So, I've previously stated that I was going to try to not post a lot about the Cardinals, but something happened in their game today at Milwaukee that is too hilarious to ignore.

Jason LaRue is our back-up catcher and a major league veteran.  He was playing today to give Yadier Molina a day off.  The Cardinals were taking the field in the bottom of the 6th when the unthinkable happened.

The Milwaukee Brewers have a traditional 6th inning sausage race (much like the the hot dog race at Royals games that relish clearly dominates).  It consists of adults dressing up in 5 different, extremely tall sausage outfits (such as polish, bratwurst, italian, etc.).  They then race down the 3rd base line and the winner receives a whole lot of glory.  Here's a picture of the sausages for you, just so you can get an idea of what we're dealing with...

I guess Jason forgot about this awesome tradition because he trotted out right into the middle of it and, oh yeah, almost got trampled by some sausages.  Oh, man.  My favorite part was when he realized he was surrounded by stampeding sausages and went into a defensive run.  You could see him panic a little and brace for the impact.

Unfortunately for me, he made it out without actually getting hit, but I'm still laughing about it.  The Sportscenter guys are having some fun with it, but I can't seem to find a video or even a picture to post anywhere.  So you'll just have to settle for my awesome description of the event.  If I find a video, I'll post it.

This is a lot of the reason I love baseball.

Can't Read My, Can't Read My

I won't tell you that I love you

Kiss or hug you

Cause I'm bluffin' 

with my muffin, I'm not lying 

I'm just stunnin' with my love-glue gunnin'

Just like a chick in a casino

Take your bank before I pay you out

I promise this, promise this 

Check this hand cause I'm marvelous

Can't read my, can't read my

He can't read my poker face 

(She has got one like no other)

Pa-pa-pa-poker face, pa-pa-poker face

That is lyrical genius, folks.  I really think America is connecting to this song because it speaks to the societal pressures on women to fake an emotional indifference that is supposed to display an ability to reject attachments that are often mistaken for weakness.

Or it's just a catchy beat and Lady Gaga wears funny outfits.  Either way, I'm going to continue to listen to it every morning on my way to work so that I'm in a good mood when I serve people coffee all day.  Thanks, Lady. 

On a related note, why do pop stars get to ignore all rules of modern English and simply create their own slang in order to rhyme?  I mean, bluffin' with my muffin, is not a saying.  It doesn't even mean anything.  But if you ask a middle schooler, they would probably tell you that it means something dirty.  It always does.

Good luck getting Poker Face out of your head!

Woot!

I am super pumped today because both Mandi and Lacey have started their very own, little newborn baby blogs where they're going to tell us all about their lives in Hawaii and Clarkston, WA.  (Sorry Lace, Hawaii sounds way cooler.)

What a joyful day.

I Love Blogs

I hope that I have made that clear.  If you have not started a blog yet, I highly encourage you to do it.

There is one problem that I have with blogging: it makes me not journal.  

I have always been a journaler.  It started in middle school with angsty poetry and purposefully mean entries that I would leave out for people to find.

It has always helped me to write things down.  It helps me process, remember, validate.  Even with simple things.  For example, if I write down directions to somewhere, I'll have them memorized.  You could tell me the directions 4 times and I'll get them mixed up, but if I write them down once, they're there forever.

I have never been a diary-keeper.  I never wrote down what I was doing or what funny thing happened that day.  That's something that the blog encourages me to do and I find that I love having those things preserved.

But there is a lot that I will never blog about.  I'm too aware of my audience.  If someone's hurt me, if I'm embarrassed or ashamed, I'm probably not going to put it out there for friends, family and random facebook followers to see.  But if I don't write about them, I'm going to ignore them.

Like today, I really wanted to write a post about how I emotionally attach certain things in my life to people that they remind me of and then when those people hurt me, it ruins those things that I love and it makes me mad.  But I realized I couldn't do that without talking about the person and the thing and the hurt involved.  And it doesn't seem fair to defame that person on my blog.  But you can only be so vague before it's completely impossible to connect with what is being said.  See?  

So, I guess I should stop talking about how I need to journal about this stuff and just go do it.  I guess I'll have to settle for something that (I can hope) nobody is ever going to read.

Much love.

Song of the Day: Be OK by Ingrid Michaelson

Judgement is So Easy (Bachelorette, Ep. 2)

Dear Jillian,

First of all, I would like to say that I approve whole-heartedly of you giving a rose to a man simply because he put on a speedo and jumped into the ocean.  I like what that says about your priorities.

Also, I approve of the fact that you then turned around and sent the dude home who stripped naked and jumped in the pool after calling everyone out to watch.  There's a fine line between funny and desperate, and you have drawn it well.

As someone sitting in my living room and judging you and this entire process, I can tell you that Wes is a scuzz bucket and the break dance instructor is awesome.  The Globetrotters, however, make me sad.  

I'll just reiterate one thing for you this week:  your grandma and America are watching.  Stop making out with boys you barely know.

Can't wait to see the helicopter ride with Ed next week!  

-Kate

Dear Juan,

Can't say I'm shocked that the other guys voted you off.  You seem a little dishonest to me.  I'm not going to say over and over that you're breaking "Man Code" or suggest we tie you up and take turns beating you like Dave did, but I will say that you're kind of a tool.

BTW, it does not make you sound cool when you tell someone that their eyes are "absolutely luminous" in front of a camera.  That is a line.  Nothing but.

Best of luck!

-Kate

Dear Dave,

Back off with the Man Code stuff.  Nobody knows what you're talking about.

Also, it's hard to get testosterone out of dress clothes, so please stop spewing it around the mansion.

Still, I wouldn't mind seeing you fight Juan.  If you do, I would suggest a throat punch.  It has proven effective for me.

Looking forward to it!

-Kate

Dear Wes, 

Your plan's going to back fire.  Nobody will buy your record once they find out you're a sleaze ball.  Country music fans like their stars wholesome.  

I already hate you!

-Kate

Dear Ed,

Call me.

-Kate

Photo Op

This may be the most darling picture I've ever seen...

Apparently, the little boy wanted to see if the president's haircut felt the same as his.

I find this poignant and incredibly sweet.  Yes, little boy, he's the same as you.  And you're the same as him.  

I wish I could fast forward and see who this little boy grows up to be...

On a different note, I wish Lady Gaga would stop dressing like a raunchy 1970s B-movie space cadet.  Because her music is addicting, but I can't look right at her.  Still, I can't stop singing this one...

Song of the Day: Poker Face by Lady Gaga

I Heard That Cleanliness is Next to Godliness

So the one benefit to being unemployed for so long was that I was keeping my room/bathroom/car extremely (by my standards) clean.  I'll be honest, it's the first thing to go once I'm busy.  My room is a mess right now and it's driving me a little nuts (but not enough to stop blogging and clean it).

However, if my mom were to walk into my room right now, she would probably be amazed at how clean it is compared to the state of my room always throughout my entire time living at home.  The older I get, the less I can stand clutter.  I think this has a lot to do with the fact that I live with increasingly less stuff the older I get.

I used to be a notorious pack rat.  5th grade art project?  Have it.  Every note ever passed to me in class? In a box in my closet.  Unfinished projects, books that I'll never read again, old cassette tapes, VHS movies without a VCR, notebooks, high school spirit day costumes, etc.? All tucked away at my parents'.

When I moved away to college, I brought a lot of stuff with me.  Almost all of the furniture in our duplex was mine.  The kitchen was fully stocked with my parents old dinnerware and pots and pans.  

Then I had to move to Oregon and could only take what would fit in my Blazer.  Then I had to move to NYC with whatever could fit in one suitcase.  My stuff significantly decreased.  And I realized I liked it.  A lot.

And now I find that I can't stand to be cluttered with unnecessary crap.

That does not mean I want my mom to get rid of my boxes of stuffed animals, but it does mean that I don't want to have to move them into my house.  (Sorry, Mom.)

Fortunately, I have Monday off.  That is going to mean a lot of cleaning and most likely a Goodwill run.  I love holidays.

Peace.

Song of the Day: Sober by Pink (My favorite line: I don't want to be the girl that has to fill the silence... Solid.)

I'm Glad it Wasn't Me

So, today I almost witnessed a man plummet to his death.  

It was not exciting.  It was actually kind of horrifying.  (OK, maybe a little exciting as well.)

There I was, minding my own business.  I was inside Grand Street Coffee, doing what baristas do.  (Which, in my case, is normally cleaning.)  We had a couple of guys in installing our cable and it was only myself and my boss Scott in the store.  We noticed that the cable guys had given up attempting to hook up our cable and instead were standing outside, gawking at something, and talking on their phones.

Scott went out to see what was going on.  I was curious, but continued about my day.

Next, I heard the sirens.  And then more sirens.  And then some more sirens.  I wandered outside and saw 3 fire trucks blocking off the street in front of the building 2 down from us.  I started looking around for the fire.  I could hear more sirens in the distance.  

Finally, I glanced up and quickly realized what the problem was.  There was some of that painter's scaffolding hanging off the roof of the 10 story building.  It had obviously encountered some issues, as it was hanging by only one side.  There was a bucket of paint splattered on the ground below it and a man hanging on strapped to the scaffolding.

By the time I got outside, one of the workers had broken a window and made it inside, but the other man couldn't make his way down and was just waiting there.  It seemed like he was OK, and the fire truck with the big ladder was pulling up which made me feel good.

But this is when things got dicey.  Rather than waiting for the firemen to make their way to the roof, the man's friend decided to attempt to Cliffhanger pull the dude up to the roof off the scaffolding.  They locked hands, the man on the roof started to pull, and the dude on the scaffolding simply started to dangle even more precariously 1o stories up.  

The firefighters started yelling from the ground and moving the ladder as fast as they could.  You could tell they were worried and that's when I got worried too.  At that point, I had to go inside because, morbid curiosity or not, I did not want to witness this man falling to his death.  That doesn't seem like something I need to see.

After a few minutes, I made my way back out.  I hadn't heard any yelling and I wanted to make sure the man was OK.  He had somehow gotten back onto the not sturdy scaffolding which seemed much wiser to me.  Turns out the fire ladder did not reach all the way up to the guy, so he had to wait for the firemen to get to the roof and go through the whole process of rescuing him.

They ended up lowering a firefighter down to rescue harness him and then pulled them both up.  The process of pulling them up gave me quite a fright again even though I was certain the firefighters had harnessed him in well.  There was just this moment where his feet were dangling that had me near tears.  

But they made the rescue and all was good.  Oh, and there ended up being like 9 fire trucks and 2 news helicopters to add to the excitement.  I felt like I was in a movie.

Too much excitement for me.

Check out the story in the star here.

Toilet Bobby

It is easy to pinpoint my favorite thing about working in a coffee shop: getting to know the regular customers.  

It is an interesting group of people who love their coffee and I love seeing the smallest little snippets of their lives.  I, being me, feel as though I know these people.  I've made up names and personalities and entire lives for them in my head.  

In fact, my coworker Nicole and I have turned guessing people's names into a game.  Everyone who comes in, we give a name to based on what we think would fit their personalities.  The problem with this is about half of our customers have actually told us their names and the other half we have made up.  And I can't for the life of me remember which is which.  So I'm sure to call someone by the complete wrong name any day now.

Some of my favorite customers so far are Rob, the guy who brought the same coupon from Ink in 4 times to get a free cup of coffee and Bobby, who very excitedly talked about how awesome our toilets are for a while.  Then there's Lynn and Tyrone who describe themselves as "early morning workout enthusiasts," Tom who journals for a while every day, and Frank, the self- (loudly) proclaimed small business owner with lots of suggestions.

It is an interesting cast of characters daily and that feeds my soul.  I hope to create a warm and welcoming place for them to have an awesome cup of coffee, time, and the environment to feed their souls a little as well.  I really enjoy coffee shops.

Also, my coworkers are awesome and when it's slow we play Uno.  We have a running scoreboard going and I (no surprise here) am dominating.  Really, they're all super cool and I've enjoyed getting to know them and laughing at funny coffee shop randomness.  

Oh, and SYTYCD starts tonight.  

Life is good.

Song of the Day: Dancing by Elisa (also a little taste of what we can look forward to all summer... easily my favorite show on TV.)

The Bachelorette

Dear Jillian,

I think you're insane, but I am stoked that you got your own season of the Bachelorette.  You were my favorite of the final few last season and it is going to be fun watching you wade through this sea of testosterone and attempt to find "true love." (I'll be referring to it as "TV love" but if you want to stick with "true love" that's fine.)

Here's my advice: settle down.  Back off a little.  Don't let the creepiness of the mansion rub off on you.  This show is too extreme.

I just watched the intro of all the men that you're going to see if you love.  That's a lot of overly confident men you have there.  I would bet there are a great many douche bags in this group.  Good luck wading through them.  

Most important thing first:  If you don't end up wanting Jake the pilot or Ed from Chicago, can I have him? 

If you're anything like me you'll get rid of all the men that have anything like "executive," "finance" or "entrepreneur" under their names.  They all seem a little creepy and soulless.  But breakdance instructor, pilot, and photographer?  Yes, please.

Oh, and if you could tell the dude from Kansas to just go ahead and pack his bags now, that wold be great.  But graphic designer in the Member's Only jacket?  He.  Is.  Awesome.

I have to give you some props for your poise.  If I had 25 guys all trying to impress me, I would turn super awkward.  You're holding your own nicely.

One last piece of advice:  Don't be too slutty.  Your grandma's watching.

Enjoy the ride, Jillian.  I'll be watching.  (And judging.)

-Kate

Dear Bachelors,

Next time, don't wear lime green shirts or shiny jackets.  Also, don't be a fitness model or awkwardly man hug the other dudes when you have to leave.  Your chances with women will improve exponentially.

Better luck next time.

-Kate

Workin' Girl (Does That Mean Hooker? If So, Please Ignore This Title)

Yep, you should check out Sseko.

Firstly, I would like to say thanks to both Bonnie and Sara for their encouragement of my songs of the day.  

On to today's post: 

You may wonder why I haven't posted for the past couple of days.  I know you've probably all missed me and my witticisms greatly, but I've been very busy and important.  You see, I have a job.  

That's right, folks.  I am officially a barista again and, man, does it feel good.

Wednesday and Thursday were my first days of legitimate paid work in a while.  We had barista training which was surprisingly fun.  I got to start to get to know the other 5 baristas I will be working with and they all seem pretty cool.  Although they're all way hipper than me.  One of the girls started talking about how it was really cool that we were all artists and that's when I had to break it to them that unless coloring with crayons in my Big Book of Fun and Games (Wal-Mart, $1) qualifies me as an artist, than she was mistaken.

But they're all pretty cool and I got to spend 2 days straight talking coffee.  We're using the Roasterie's coffee beans which means yummy.  Also, they sent in their barista trainer and he knows what's up.  He taught me a bunch of tricks that make me feel like I'm on my barista game.  I'm working on foam art.  I'm that legit.  Also, he talked a while about different beans and roasts and what flavors come from what regions.  I feel like Sara's the only one who's going to appreciate how fun this was, but trust me, it's exciting to learn these things.

Today was our first official opening.  We had a lot of people come in and say they had been waiting for a while for us to open up and were excited.  It was fun to see who was going to become a regular.  There is nothing I like better than random customer friends.  I'm definitely hoping it gets a lot busier but it was only our first day so I'm sure it will.

I've really enjoyed being in on the ground floor in this place.  They're definitely wanting our input on a lot of stuff and really listening to what we think will work or what won't.  It's going to be fun to see it take off.

So if you're in KC, come to Grand Street Coffee on the corner of 20th and Grand (a couple buildings down from the Western Auto building).  I'll make you an awesome drink.

But don't forget to tip your barista.

Much love.

Song of the Day: Home by Ian Axel

Seriously, Just Click on the Link

If you're not already frequenting the Sseko blog, you should be.

Especially today.  There's a video of the girls up and if you don't jump up down screaming at how wonderful they are and how awesome their lives are going to be, then you and I are nothing alike.

Seriously, how great are they?

I get more excited by the day...

I Don't Care if You Like It, I'm Doing It Anyway (Blog Edition)

I have what I feel is a pretty accurate premonition that nobody takes the times to listen to my songs of the day.  

Even though they are awesome and I take great care in picking them and spend lots of time on youtube wading through the crappy videos people took with digital cameras to get to ones that have decent audio.

I've been paranoid about this for a while and considered posing the question to all of you to see if it was worth it to keep putting them up.

But then I decided I didn't want to.  Because I really like posting them.  They normally completely sum up something that is going on inside my head or remind me of some moment or just bring me joy.  And if I asked if you all listen to them and I didn't get a single affirmative response, I'd have to stop posting them.  Because of my pride, you know.

So instead I'm going to post one of my all-time favorites and just assume that everyone is going to click on the big play button and thoroughly enjoy my awesome taste in music.

If you wanted to spend some time affirming me by commenting on how awesome it is, that would be fine.  Even if you're one of those people who doesn't comment because you think it's probably a little creepy that you read my blog since we only kind of know each other.  (You know who you are... You found my blog because we have some random mutual friend that posted my link or you accidentally facebook stalked me and now you read my blog all the time.  And I know you're out there because I'm that person on several other people's blogs.  Probably yours if you've got one.)  Just post anonymously.  I don't have a way to track you down, don't worry.  

This song is literally one my favorite songs of all-time.  It is the ultimate late-night, only one awake, staring at the ceiling song.  I love it like a person and I've listened to it a ridiculous amount of times over several years.  I've also spent a lot of time journaling with this song on repeat.  And I have no idea why I love it so much which kind of makes me love it more.

Enjoy.

Song of the Day:  Mid-November by Johnathan Rice

I Can't Get Enough of Ben Harper

This video is legit beyond legit.

Seriously, I just watched it like 10 times in a row.  Ben Harper is speaking to my heart recently.

I think what gets me about this video is that he's essentially singing an optimistic message:  I shall not walk alone.  And yet, he seems almost desperate.  Unconvinced.  Scared.  Like the idea of having someone to share in his burdens is unbelievable.  The song seems as though it's half a plea, half a praise.

Here's the thing:  my life is awesome right now.  I'm happy, I'm content, I'm everything I want to be.  But I understand the underlying battle against fear, I understand that there will be more nights in my life that are made of tears and sadness and restlessness.  

I understand what the look on his face is.  I understand a single tear at the remembrance of it all.  

I understand.  

I really like music.  And youtube.  And Ben Harper.

(Full disclosure: My emotional connection to this video may also have to do with the fact that the speaker from 1st session last summer in the Canyon played this video one night during his talk.  And that it's 1 AM and I've worked like 60 hours this week.)

I Miss Dr. Becky

Cool kids wear sandals.

So, I finally broke down and went to the doctor.  I've been slowly hacking up my left lung for the past 3 weeks.  But I live in Kansas City and there's no Dr. Becky there.

(Dr. Becky is the doctor I've gone to literally all my life.  I have seriously only ever seen maybe 2 other doctors.  Both were at the student health center.  Both sucked.  There's something weird to me about seeing a doctor that doesn't also lead music at my church.  It's just how I was raised.)

I rarely go to the doctor, not because I don't believe in modern medicine, but because I'm always worried that I'm going to go and they're going to tell me that I have a common cold and I should stop whining.  However,  weeks of coughing is too much.  The taste of cough drops gets really old.

So, I came home and asked my mommy to put me in contact with my doctor.  Dr. Becky has retired (seriously, can I stop getting old please?), so I had to go see a new doctor.  But she's in the same office that Dr. Becky was in, so that was comforting.  

She determined there's really nothing wrong with me.

Awesome.

She gave me an antibiotic "just in case" and told me to come back if it doesn't get better.  I'm really hoping it gets better.

On a completely unrelated note, Rick Ankiel had the worst face-plant I've ever seen last night.  Ouchie.  Phil astutely pointed out to me that it was probably because he shaved the 'stache.  I think he's right.  Really though, it was a scary hit and Ankiel's one of my favorite players, so I'm hoping he heals quickly.  

Mucho amore.

Check it Out!

Woot!  Woot!  Sseko's got a blog!

http://www.ssekodesigns.blogspot.com/

Get pumped...

Wolf! Wolf!

I feel like the boy who cried wolf.  Because I'm going to tell you all that I had the best day ever yesterday and I'm going to guess that you will think that's an exaggeration.  You'll point out the several other times I've made this claim.  And I'll hang my head with shame.

But, seriously, for real, no lie, I had the best day ever yesterday.

Starting at 12:0o AM, when I was already spooning with Liz on an extremely comfortable posturepedic mattress on a sidewalk in downtown KC.  Why, you may ask?

The answer is simple.  We were determined to win 52 free movie tickets.  That's right, 52 free movie tickets.  One a week for a year.  

All we had to do was be one of the first 100 people in line at 8:00 AM at this new AMC theater in downtown KC, dressed as a movie character or celebrity.  Simple.

We convinced John to come with us (Unemployed Friends of KC, unite!).  Liz was dressed as Cindy Lou Who (of course), I was Marge Gunderson from Fargo and John was Chuck Norris.

We camped out.  It was beautiful.  Our mattress was comfy.  We almost killed the drunken crowd a few people down the line from us and made some awesome friends in the 2 cool guys behind us and the group of Rockhurst students in front of us.

Oh, and we got 52 free movie tickets at 8:00 AM.  If you're nice, I'll treat you to a movie.  (Check out Liz in the KC Star here.  She was also on the news.  Hilarious.)

After getting our tickets, I headed home and slept for a couple hours because, oops, I had an interview at a coffee shop at 1:45.  Staying up all night, bad life decision or awesome story?  Probably both.

But I went to my interview, it went really well, and...

They hired me!

That's right, the unthinkable has happened.  I got a job!  I'm going to be working at this awesome coffee shop/art gallery and altogether loving life.  I still have a couple days off during the week so I can do Sseko stuff with Liz.  And I get to make coffee.  And talk to people.  There are few better jobs for me.

The only sucky thing is working weekends, but I don't really mind that.  And I'm going to have a paycheck.

The awesomeness extends into today as I'm in Mid-MO watching the Cardinals on Fox Sports Mid-West and I just got back from Liz's shower in Columbia where I got to see a whole lot of friends that I hadn't seen in a very long time.  It was so fun catching up with everyone and made me even more pumped for the Bohannon/Forkin Wedding Extravaganza of 08.  I miss people.

So there you go, actual best day ever.  If I say it again, you can shame me.

Much love.